Parents Dating

If you become widowed, it is a huge loss to lose your partner in life.  It is especially difficult if you have now become a single parent.  Now all the day-to-day tasks of raising the children are left up to you, and you have no one to bounce ideas off of. The ages and stages of the children can definitely make a difference in how much the loss will affect you and your children.

At some point though, you may become ready to date again, and dating with kids faces its own set of challenges that are different from when you dated without having children.  Here are some things to consider about dating again:

• Make sure that you have had enough time to grieve – It can be difficult to find time to grieve when you have become a single parent because of the loss of your spouse.  Most companies give little time off for bereavement, and therefore you need to jump back into your job quickly, and have to take care of the children’s needs.  Keeping busy is good, but it has to be balanced with the time to reflect on what has happened and to be able to go through the normal reactions to grief such as sadness, anger, and so on.
• Men and Women Are Different - and it helps you to be aware of this.  What I’m referring to is that men tend to begin dating too quickly after the death of a spouse.  When you add kids into the picture, it can make things really difficult for the children.  Off the top of my head, I can think of two men I know who did this, and it really caused problems with their children.  Women, on the other hand, often put off dating for such a long time after the death of a spouse, and keep themselves so busy with their children’s lives that they no longer have their own social lives.

Please read more about this topic at this post at “Dating with Children.”

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